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The Beagle
"East Meck's
News Source"
Phones Seized Today By Brave Administrators:
3
Study finds guy in front of you in the bathroom line must be dead
ALMOST 20 min.s ago you made a request w/ your $upervisor 2 use the bathroom,…
School Power Fails After Overwhelming Bark AI Usage
East Meck's power grid failed Tuesday after a surge in Bark AI usage skyrocketed demand.
Drye Mandates Pointless Tests to Prepare for Pointless Tests
Space Chancellor Steve Drye announced today that the upcoming fortnight's schedule would be utterly destroyed…
Head Beagler Fired After Taking Sixty Consecutive Sick Days
The Head Beagler of the beloved East Meck Beagle was fired today after taking sixty-two…
Steve Drye Announces “East Tech”
Principal Drye announced Monday the school would be undergoing a high-tech transformation.
Student Detained for Protesting Wrong
A student was detained this Tuesday after protesting incorrectly.
IBESS Student Learns Something
An IB Environmental Systems & Societies student reportedly learned something for the first time this…
How to Fix Monroe Road Traffic
A concerned student proposes their five-step plan to fix morning traffic on Monroe Rd.
Student Dies of Old Age in 4000 Stairwell
A student tragically perished this week after waiting over 50 years to get down from…